'Showing you care is the biggest thing'

Dean Arrowsmith is director of coaching of the United and Extra programs at the American Youth Soccer Organisation’s Region 300 in Chicago.

He moved to the US permanently seven years ago to take up a full-time role in soccer, having gained much of his experience back in Dundalk, Ireland.

Alongside AYSO, he also has another very important role: co-founder and chairperson of Head In The Game, a mental health campaign aiming to start a conversation for those involved in the League of Ireland. 

In the two years since its inception, Head In The Game has made a big impact, offering a safe space for coaches that may be struggling with their mental health.

Dean himself has been affected by self-confidence issues and imposter syndrome when on a Uefa B course at the age of 21.

SCW caught up with Dean to discuss the work Head in the Game does, the pressures coaches face, and tools for coping with them.

Please note: this article contains references to suicide, from the start.

SCW: Can you tell us a bit more about Head In The Game and your involvement?

DA: “I lost an uncle to suicide in 2017. Since then, I’ve been advocating for mental health and, more specifically, men’s mental health.

"Dundalk FC’s videographer [Harry Taaffe] committed suicide in July 2020. It’s actually coming up to his anniversary at the end of next week.

"If you’re struggling with your mental health, it’s never a quick fix. As I’ve learned, over the last two years especially, it’s a rollercoaster. You have high moments where you’re feeling great, you have low moments where you feel really down.

“In a group chat with a couple of supporters of Dundalk, the day after Harry passed, I said something had to be done. 

"That’s how Head In The Game was born - it was myself and five other lads from Dundalk. We are just supporters - none of us are clinicians or psychologists.

"I wrote a poem called The Floodlights which was one of the first things that went out for Head In The Game. 

"The day we released it, I had to go and do a 10-mile run, because I didn’t want to look at social media when it went up - I didn’t know how people were going to react.

"If you’re struggling with your mental health, it’s no quick fix - it’s a rollercoaster..."

"It had 250,000 views within the first 48 hours, so it resonated with a lot of people. For me, that was a sign that we were on the right track.

“Initially our idea was centred around men’s mental health. But there’s such a big push on the women’s game, we have to make sure we’re inclusive.

"It’s not just about players. We want to be inclusive of supporters, players, coaches, referees - anyone involved in our sport.

“The way that it’s grown within the football community and the goodwill we have received is just absolutely phenomenal.

“Head In The Game isn’t going to take credit for this, but you’re seeing a lot more footballers starting to talk openly about their mental health.

"You’re [also] seeing coaches talk about mental health. I heard [West Ham United manager] David Moyes on a podcast recently talk very openly about his mental health.

"That is probably what sparked my interest on the coach’s side of mental health.”

SCW: What pressures are on coaches that can lead to mental health struggles?

DA: "About a month ago, I surveyed around 100 coaches about burnout and the impact on their mental health.

"At grassroots, every coach said parents are a massive factor in the negative impact on their mental health. 

“At a higher level, I’ve got friends that are coaching in League One and League Two - they have said you’re only six games away from the sack. Thankfully, I’m in a role where I don’t face that kind of pressure. 

"When you’re in grassroots, so as long as you’re developing players, you’re set.

"But when you’re at the top level, and you’re only six games away from the sack, I couldn’t imagine that pressure. I feel that’s something that would be really stressful. 

“When you’re coaching, you don’t really have a social life. You’re coaching all the time.

"I read [former QPR and Crystal Palace manager] Ian Holloway’s book. He was talking about his wife as a ’football manager widow’ because she never sees him, or he’s always switched on to the game. All of that definitely has an effect on mental health. 

“I’m hoping that the work we’re doing through Head In The Game and this coach survey, can help coaches come up with a couple of different things that can help - like a valve, something that can just release a little bit of that tension. 

“For me, it’s going for a run. If I run a 5K, that might help my mental health. It’s making sure that it doesn’t get too much that I need to run a marathon to sort my mental health. 

"It’s trying to help coaches figure out ways to enjoy their job, but also be able to switch off because that’s the hardest part. I still find today as a coach you can never switch off.”